Because Replying “Wrong Number” is Boring
So This Happened This dude had it coming. This was the second time this year he’s contacted “Tori”.
Clothes Shopping
Life Hack: A clothes shopping outfit There are clothes living rent-free in your closet because you thought they were cute in the store, but you actually NEVER wear them. How do you avoid that? Here’s my tip. Get dressed in your favorite …
A Cactus Hunt
It’s 2019. William is 5. We are outside watering the trees when William exclaims, “Let’s go on a cactus hunt!” Thinking this will take us as far as the backyard neighbor’s cactus, I agree. Five minutes later, we realize that conditions are …
A Cheesy Song vs The Bike Helmet of Shame
1999. I’m nine years old. I own the ugliest bike helmet I’ve ever laid eyes on. It is SO SO bad. I think someone sawed a bowling ball in half, added a buckle, and called it a helmet. Picture this: A scrawny …
Graduation Day: Is it too late to prove I’m cool?
Naturally, with a title like that^, this turns out to be the most embarrassing story of my life to date. Let’s proceed. —————————— May 21st, 2008. It’s my 2,339th day of school together with these kids. The same kids who do not classify …
Blocksite
Blocksite. A recent, but great download that keeps me off social media. I don’t keep certain social media apps on my phone. But I try to sabotage my own time by signing in through Safari anyway. Blocksite stops me from being such …
Sacks
Football Fold Your Sacks There’s regular grocery sacks, and then there’s stronger, better, handsomer grocery sacks. You know the kind I’m talking about. It hurts a little bit more to throw these away, because you know you’ll be kicking yourself later when …
Duolingo Battle
I’ve been competing in the Diamond league for weeks now hoping to earn the ”Legendary” achievement by the time we leave for Mexico next month. — No easy task, I’m finding out. Each Sunday night, my current league of randomized competitors has …
Fairlife Strawberry Milk
Fairlife Strawberry Milk – I don’t know the specifics on why this tastes 10x better than Nesquik, but I suspect it’s because it’s milked from free-range, dark-magic-enhanced strawberries. I know if it tastes like I’m drinking a melted milkshake that it’s probably …